Sunday, January 29, 2012



a token; indication.
any objectaction, event, pattern, etc., that conveys meaning.
a conventional or arbitrary mark, figure, or symbol used asan abbreviation for the word or words it represents.
a motion or gesture used to express or convey an idea,command, decisionetc.: Her nod was a sign that it was time toleave.
a notice, bearing a namedirection, warning, oradvertisement, that is displayed or posted for public view: atraffic sign; a store sign.

I bolded the second meaning of "sign" or in some cases an "omen." The world "omen" to me is creepier than the word "sign" so I believe in signs (less creepy). To be honest, I have been meaning to write this post for awhile but I kept forgetting but a sign keeps popping up to remind me. 

A cardinal. Yep, a bird. For those of you who know mean (really know me) I am terrified of birds. It comes from multiple occassions of birds chasing me. And a few pooping incidents as well. Thank you pigeons in Milan, Italy for welcoming me to your country. 

Back to my point, about a week before Harper's surgery I was having serious doubt and anxiety that the surgery wasn't going to be as planned. I feared something bad was going to happen and I wouldn't see my daughter again. Then I saw a red cardinal outside my kitchen door. "Pretty," I thought and kept moving into the bedroom to get ready for the day. There it was again. Hmm, it's following me. Now this cardinal was easy to spot. A bright red bird against naked trees is sure to stand out. I then realized that this bird signified something and I, of course, went to Google. 

The symbolic meaning of cardinals deals with vibrancy and brilliance.
As we observe the cardinal – particularly against the backdrop of the stark winter months, we are reminded that even when things appear bleak or isolated, there is always the presence of beauty, hope, and love.

(taken from here)

I felt a sense of relief after reading that meaning. My mood shifted and I was, once again, focused on the positive. Then, the day before H's surgery, her and I had to go to the hospital for pre-op appointments. I was a mess. I cried the entire car ride to the hospital. Until I saw this...
I tried pointing at the license plate but my finger is way off. If you can't read it, it says: JC LVZ U.
Translation: Jesus Christ Loves You. 
JC and I haven't been the best of buds in a long time so this plate was a sign that I was taking myself, and Harper, in the right direction. 
Go ahead, call me crazy. I'm sure many of you don't believe in signs, omens, premonitions, or anything else in that nature. But I do and these signs, as silly as it sounds, helped me realize that Harper would have a successful surgery. Maybe I was grasping at anything that I could. I do know that Mr. Cardinal has made numerous appearances in my yard since we have been home from the hospital as if he is there to reassure me that he does know what he is talking about. 
I don't need a sign to tell me that my 5 month old (gasp...tomorrow) is growing up! I just have to look at her!!

It's Sunday night and Andy is cooking Brisket (yum-o) and Harper and I go back to school/work on Wednesday so I'm going to soak up every minute with my little H!

1 comment:

Heidi Ehle said...

In the beginning of summer the year that I was pregnant with Liddy, I looked out my window one morning to see a family of 5 hawks (a mom, a dad, and three little ones) in the yard across the street. Not roosting as you would think, but on the ground. The little ones were playing in a mud puddle while the parents looked on. It was an amazing sight to me (one that brought me to tears!) since I have lived in this neighborhood pretty much my entire life and have NEVER seen hawks near the houses, let alone on the ground unless they were eating. The fact that there were five when our family was welcoming its fifth member was a little too coincidental for me. But they eventually flew away and I really didn't think a whole lot more about solitary hawk started roosting in our yard. Every day. In the tree out front, even on the washer in our driveway one day. He wasn't afraid of us (we got really close to him more than once) and would always show up at a time when I would be sure to see him.
This is what I found when I looked it up:
"In Native American cultures the hawk represents a messenger. It often appears in our life when we need to pay attention to the subtle messages found in our surroundings and from those we come in contact with." "One thing that all hawks have in common is the skill to move between the seen and unseen realms gracefully connecting both worlds together." "Hawk signifies union with Great Spirit. A bird of the heavens the hawk orchestrates the changes necessary for our spiritual growth."
This was pre-DS diagnosis. A message being brought to me from someone bigger than I as to what I should do in the future.....Without a doubt I think so.
That hawk came every day without fail for close to three weeks, then disappeared. I have never seen another hawk in the neighborhood. So you tell me...portent of the future? I have to believe that it was....